I should probably watch my “behaver”

August 7, 2008 at 6:07 am 25 comments

Wow, looky here, I have a reader that has obviously been tied to a chair, blind folded, had its mouth muffled with soggy feminine ware and forced recitals of my blog postings down Its ears.  Must be, because evidently It went on to read not only just one of my postings, but a few.  Please welcome my latest troll, b- dazzler:

 

“i started reading your blog- i was appalled at you language and hearing how you made a fool of yourself , so sad you should step back and look at your self and your behaver”

 

I shit you not. That delicious English is in all original glory too.

 

Listen up, “b- dazzler”, you gave me your (pathetically put) opinion, now here’s mine:

 

Dipshit, if you’re going to chastise me on my language, make sure yours is actually grammatically correct.  You know I’m about to rip you apart next, don’t you?

 

a.       “i” generally is used as a Capital Letter.  You could do that by utilizing the “Shift” key conveniently placed either to the left OR the right sides of your “space bar” – that’s the longish key situated at the bottom of your keypad. 

b.       Don’t be afraid of using commas to separate parts of your sentence in order to induce an actual pause between statements. 

c.       “Behaver”?  Seriously?  Good lawd.  How old are you mofo, eleven?  Go back to school, you’re far too stupid to read this website anyway.

d.       Lastly, when you have intent in finishing a sentence, a little full stop usually does the trick. 

 

I bet you’re sitting there shaking your tiny little troll head and thinking to your little own self, ‘I probably should have reread my stupid little comment that has absolutely no intelligence or constructive use’. 

 

Secondly, I urge you to read my disclaimer.  It can be found at the top of my page here under About Me, but I’ll give you the link too.  Here, click the words that you are reading now.  Yes, these words, Fool!  Basically, this is my website.  I welcome comments, I really do, but I only like feedback if it serves to either,

 

1.       make me laugh in a good way

2.       make actual sense

3.       corrects something I have incorrectly written

4.       entices conversation

 

I’ve made your ridiculous comment Brick of The Week.  Now, would you like a tissue for your issue?

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25 Comments Add your own

  • 1. shebee  |  August 7, 2008 at 6:26 am

    Let it not be said that SheBee can’t be mean when the necessity calls 😉

    Reply
  • 2. StevenMcD  |  August 7, 2008 at 6:22 am

    HAHAHA ROFLOL! Well done lady, well said!

    Reply
  • 3. angel  |  August 7, 2008 at 6:22 am

    Oh my word shebeeliciousness…
    ROTFLMAO!!!
    If I ever get mean comments will
    you write my rebuttals!!

    Reply
  • 4. shebee  |  August 7, 2008 at 6:40 am

    Stevo hehe, “lady” is probably something dear old B-dazzler would disagree with…

    Reply
  • 5. Ches  |  August 7, 2008 at 10:27 am

    Ha ha, well said…it’s your blog, you can blog it!

    Funny, I know this real asshole from Wanderes cricket club who’s nickname is b-dazzler…wonder if it’s the same breed of hole?

    Reply
  • 6. Glugster  |  August 7, 2008 at 10:37 am

    Now you are really behavering bad. Shocking.

    Reply
  • 7. shebee  |  August 7, 2008 at 10:52 am

    Chesie, careful babe – you might be giving yourself away again, and this time to a Troll! Sis!

    Also, I like being the only one here knowing your real name 😀

    Gluggie, you need to behaver your tweets, dude! “Nibbling Angels ear” and looking at Angels….blog” one would think you two are in lust or sumfink.

    Reply
  • 8. charmskool  |  August 7, 2008 at 10:55 am

    Mwhahaha that’s the funniest comment from B-dazzler – I guess she’s a little b-brainless? I wish she’d come be rude to me on my blog. I haven’t had a chance to rip someone a new one for ages and ages.

    Reply
  • 9. shebee  |  August 7, 2008 at 11:20 am

    Charm – I shall pass on the invite, darling.

    Reply
  • 10. Amy  |  August 7, 2008 at 11:22 am

    Oh good lord Claude – some people just have nothing better to do with their time, do they ?

    Kudos for you for sticking it to them…

    Reply
  • 11. justBcoz  |  August 7, 2008 at 11:32 am

    OMF!! Just who the hell does this troll think they are “dazzling?”

    Fabulous retort Bee – LUVED it 🙂

    Reply
  • 12. shebee  |  August 7, 2008 at 12:11 pm

    Aims – thank you my buddy.

    JBC – haha, i live for your entertainment :p

    Reply
  • 13. cathjenkin  |  August 7, 2008 at 12:35 pm

    love it love love it.

    Have to say, b-dazzler, best you b-gone.

    =)

    Reply
  • 14. Stef  |  August 7, 2008 at 12:59 pm

    oh my word… *sigh* honestly doesn’t b-dazzler have something or someone to dazzle somewhere instead of lurking about leaving stupid comments…

    eish 🙂

    (if there IS any grammer eroticas in my commando please askuus me ok? mwhahahahaha)

    Reply
  • 15. B  |  August 7, 2008 at 1:12 pm

    how did b-dazzler find you anyway??

    So B-dazzler .. B-dazzle us and tell us how you came to read Sheebee and all her glory and how you stopped reading when it came to her disclaimer due to yourshock-ed-ness(feel free to use my new word too –shock-ed-ness means buggerall really)..

    And of course try using some of the given grammar tips so eloquently given to you by the ever gracious Sheebee..

    Reply
  • 16. shebee  |  August 7, 2008 at 1:28 pm

    Cath – I concur. Hate those poor persons who think they’re forced to read something that “apalls” them.

    Stef – wahahaa you said ‘eroticas’.

    B – Yoh, you feeling slightly sarcastic there my friend? 😉

    Reply
  • 17. Cameron  |  August 7, 2008 at 2:51 pm

    11.08.2008 – 14.58pm:
    This comment somehow got stuck in my spam. Lest you all think I’m censoring, I decided to publish it anyway, even if it is old
    -SheBee

    I’m all for slating the rude commenter.

    But I wouldn’t have gone the “picking on their typos” route, because seriously, is everyone else here on crack, or have they just not noticed that your posts are FULL of typographical and grammatical errors?

    Or are the commenters all yes people?

    Reply
  • 18. Stew  |  August 8, 2008 at 1:41 am

    Holy Craptacular moron Batman

    You’ve redefined pwnd.

    I wonder what you could do to standard html…

    (Please notice the liberal use of spacebar, punctuation and non-punctuation and cowbell. The cowbell is there, you just have to listen for it.)

    (please tell me the ellipsis gets you all giggly)

    Reply
  • 19. B  |  August 8, 2008 at 7:52 am

    uhm – I’m never sarcastic.. narky perhaps..

    Aaargh!…i just get so dem irritated with people like B-Dazzler..My luck I probably know the stupid cow.. sorry..

    Reply
  • 20. shebee  |  August 8, 2008 at 8:16 am

    Stew – I like you, lets be friends. And yes, baby, the elipses do it for me.

    B – waha – so what, if they’re that dumb do you want to know them?

    Reply
  • 21. Tamara  |  August 8, 2008 at 9:02 am

    I’ve never understood why people leave comments like that. Does she / he honestly think it’ll make you change the way you blog?! Really. Plus, there’s many more of us who like the way you write, so I guess it’s losing battle from spelling-b-dazzled’s side.

    Reply
  • 22. shebee  |  August 10, 2008 at 12:18 am

    Awwww Tamara! I’ve missed your comments babe!

    Reply
  • 23. shebee  |  August 11, 2008 at 3:05 pm

    Cameron, you are quite right, of course.

    I would like to point out to you a quote from my disclaimer where it states:

    “all typos or spelling errors only add character to this blog”.

    And yes, I am being candid right now. I’m the first one to admit my faults and spelling errors, typographically or not. No one is perfect. Although, considering I am actually dyslexic and quite possibly ADD, I don’t think I do too terribly.

    But hey, congratulations to you for taking out all the fun of my facetious retort.

    Reply
  • 24. Amy-Lee  |  August 17, 2008 at 3:17 pm

    I’m missing the “D” key on my keyboard. The cat scratched it off when she stretched after having a nap on the keys. So now when I am trying to type, I have to stop at every “D” spot and try and find the tiny clitoris that is my “D” key, and this really detracts from the flow of my writing. Sometimes I forget the sentence halfway through my search. Like I have now.
    Train of thought……. ah there it is.
    I also have to type with one hand most of the time as I usually have a kid in/on/spitting all over the other one. This also tends to stunt my writing.
    So the long and short of it is… we all have our problems, strange and varied they may be. But at least we make the effort.
    And don’t be going into other peoples spaces and making weepy, pathetic, moronic comments. Unless you really enjoy giving your self esteem a bashing.
    Shebee, you crack me up. Bring on the sarcasm!!!

    Reply
  • 25. BigBan  |  August 18, 2008 at 2:25 am

    Oh, Thanks! Really amazing. Greets.

    Reply

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